Friiot? Hardly. For when you take a bite of tangerine pie, you expect to spill the crumbs on your bed. A wise man once said, why don't you go and make me some toast. And a wiser man said, it is not you who makes the toast, but the toast who makes you. An even wiser man still said, In Soviet Russia, toaster cooks with you? I am part animal, part machine gun. Smithers, there's a rocket in my pocket. Do you enjoy highlighting your face? I do since I cut myself while shaving once. Bled all over the carpet. I bought a hovercraft. I got a big raise and bought myself a hovercraft. WHo put these things under the floor Boards? It's the beating of his hideous heart! Wait, ... wait ... he found a heart container. Problem solved folks, we can all go home to our pork bellies. bellly. belllybelllybelllybellly. It's inside of me! And it's attached to my soul. A piece of ham was driving down the street, when he saw a gang banger banging a gang. He drove to his girlfriend's house, cut her throat, and took her kid to the ball pit. That was some fucking ball pit! Lots of ball sauce and shit.

New, tomorrow night: the most mediocre night of your life. The night after that: the most mediacore night of your life. Thanks, a latte. A man drove to Denver where his grandmother owned a coffee shop. They found her dead in her bathtub. She had dranken a gallon of motor oil for breakfast. Lightens up the chest area, keeps things running on time. You have violated the law: the law of Pepsico. For this we sentence you to die of voltage poisoning. I have to throw up. I had pizza for lunch and now I'm going to throw it up. Here it comes. Here it comes! Transaction rollback in progress. Commit transaction.

This above all else, be true: grape popsicles taste like dying. FOllow grape popsicles on Twitter: @grapepopsicles I wonder if your mom was sad the day you were born because she thought her life was over. I think I'll go buy an ox cart. For carting my oxen. Unix? I don't know this. I like other GUI interfaces. Sausages? Never mind.

What will they call Martha Stewart Living after she passes away

Oink oink piggy wiggy I've got a ham in my belly

if Kevin Bacon was from Toronto would they call him Canadian Kevin Bacon

Corned beef, grits grits, grits grits grits grits, aaaaaaaaaaand sunglasses


at


fucking



midnight